I Let You In

I let you in, I was wide open with good intentions
this was back when I believed in what I saw, cause what I saw
was open and free
beautiful as the April rain as the summer breeze dancing with wind chimes
when innocence still existed in my laughter
When the only raptures that caught me were inside the sounds of the ocean waves
and the wind passing through the leaves of trees
the color of the grass when the sun said goodbye
The twinkling of the stars when the moon smiled and said hi
When my sunshine came from my mother's happiness
when I was a sunflower in the shadows of my mother's approval
Before my roots broke through the confinements of my home
before my home became my cage
When I was thirsty for something more
when I wanted to grow on some other soil
When art was a slave to fairy tales
that I ran so fast to escape the demands of truth
when truth was faithful and reprimanding
"I let you in" was a moment that spoke loud
the turning point between two worlds
Before I wanted to know, before I wanted to see
When childhood songs rocked me to sleep
leading me through nightmares
Before I spent my life savings to see what was inside the box
Before I wished I could take what I know and take it all back
Before I knew that "La Poubelle" was French for "the trash"
Before flattery turned sour inside my mouth
before I said I do to someone else's vows
Before I was content with just my mom
Before someone told me she needed a man
Before that man took away my sunshine
Before I knew she sold it just to pay time
I let you in
Before I knew what you had hidden up your sleeve
Before I knew who carried in your baggage on their bloody hands and knees
Before I looked in the mirror and now it was me
who let you in, who gave away my baby's sunshine and needs